


live unbruised, we are friends

by growlery



Category: Nothing Much to Do
Genre: Background Relationships, Ensemble Cast, Gen, hero is everyone's friend, non-traditional format
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-18
Updated: 2014-12-18
Packaged: 2018-03-02 02:10:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2795888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/growlery/pseuds/growlery
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Beatrice makes a video for Hero, and all their friends get really, really into it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	live unbruised, we are friends

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Diaphenia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Diaphenia/gifts).



> This is just... really ridiculous, but I hope you like it, Diaphenia!

BEATRICE: Okay, so Hero's pretty ill at the moment and she's missing out on _basically everything_ , which sucks, so I decided to make this video. 

[-]

[White, handwriting-style text says _ADVENTURES WITH BEATRICE AND FRIENDS_ , and underneath, _A WEEK IN THE LIFE_.]

[-]

BEATRICE: Yeah, yeah, cheesy, I know. Hero's gonna love it. 

[--]

BENEDICK: Are you filming? 

BEATRICE: [voice-over] No, I'm just carrying a camera around as a comment on the voyeuristic nature of modern society. 

CLAUDIO: Oh, cool. 

BEATRICE: [voice-over] I'm. Yes. I'm making a video for Hero. 

CLAUDIO: Oh, cool. 

BEATRICE: [voice-over] No, no, no, it's supposed to be candid. Like, a week in the life. Stop trying to look cool. 

URSULA: Can I just- there, that's much better. 

BEATRICE: ...maybe I should just let you make the video. 

[--]

BALTHASAR: [singing] From what you've told me, it seems like he could be the one for you.

BENEDICK: What about this? [strums a note, starts singing] Oh baby, I want you a lot, you're so super hot, why don't you come and see what I've got. 

BALTHASAR: [dubious look]

BENEDICK: Dude, I'm just saying. 

[--]

MEG: [voice-over] And over there you can see Benedick and Beatrice arguing. 

PEDRO: About _really_ pointless shit. 

URSULA: No week in our lives would be complete without it. 

MEG: [flips the camera] We all walked off ten minutes ago. They still haven't noticed. 

[-]

MEG: [voice-over] They're _still_ arguing. 

URSULA: Pretty sure they moved onto Doctor Who at some point. 

PEDRO: Oh my god, we're never going home. 

BALTHASAR: We could just leave without them? 

ENSEMBLE: [looks at each other]

ENSEMBLE: [looks at camera]

[--]

PEDRO: Hey bro, can you call my phone? I think I dropped it in the grass somewhere. 

BENEDICK: Sure, just call it yourself. You're saved under All Around Good Guy, by the way. 

PEDRO: Oh, naturally. ...huh. Who's Dear Lady Disdain? 

BENEDICK: [swipes at phone]

PEDRO: [holds out of reach]

BENEDICK: [scowls]

PEDRO: [smirks]

[--]

HERO: C'mon, you never let me do your makeup. I’m sick, indulge me. 

BEATRICE: I'm _wearing_ makeup. 

HERO: More than just eyeliner, Bea. 

BEATRICE: I like my just eyeliner!

HERO: So do I, but also it's kind of boring and I want to play with your face. [pauses] I could make you look like a robot?

BEATRICE: [narrows eyes]

BEATRICE: Fine. That would be kind of cool. 

HERO: [looks at camera]

HERO: [grins]

[-]

HERO: There we go. Beadroid!

BEATRICE: Oh my _god_ , I love you. Can you do this for prom? 

[--]

MEG: Ophelia, Romeo, Titania. Go. 

URSULA: [considers]

URSULA: Fuck Titania, marry Ophelia, kill Romeo. 

BEATRICE: Ugh, I don't blame you. Romeo's a total drip. 

ENSEMBLE: [laughs]

BEATRICE: What? 

ENSEMBLE: [laughs harder]

BEATRICE: _What_? 

[--]

BALTHASAR: So this is for Hero. Uh, you, I guess. Hi. [laughs]

BENEDICK: [off screen] Watch out, Claud'll think you're trying to steal his girl.

BEATRICE: First of all, dickface, Hero is a _person_ , not an _object_ , and it's totally disgusting that you'd-

[-]

BEATRICE: And you're completely and utterly wrong about Eleven, I mean, you can't _seriously_ think-

[-]

BALTHASAR: [singing] So sigh not so, and let them go, and be you blithe and bonny, converting all your songs of woe into hey nonny, nonny. 

ENSEMBLE: [claps] 

ENSEMBLE: [cheers]

PEDRO: You should record that properly. That was awesome. 

BALTHASAR: [laughs] 

BALTHASAR: [ducks out of frame]

[--]

BEATRICE: Right, I'll start. _Fabulous_. 

PEDRO: Kind. 

URSULA: Funny. 

CLAUDIO: Sweet. 

BENEDICK: Genuine. 

BALTHASAR: Heroic. 

MEG: Absolutely flawless makeup. 

BEATRICE: That's not one word, Meg. 

MEG: Absolutelyflawlessmakeup?

BEATRICE: [glares]

MEG: Fine, flawless. [blows kiss at screen]

VERGES: [off screen] BEAUTIFUL HERO IS BEAUTIFUL. 

ENSEMBLE: [turns around]

ENSEMBLE: [stares]

[--]

HERO: Oh my god, what. [laughs]

BEATRICE: What can I say, our friends are nerds. And Ursula's Year Nines are really, really weird. 

HERO: I am baking precisely everyone a cake, including Ursula’s Year Nine’s. [waves] Thanks, guys. You're the best nerds a girl could ask for. 


End file.
